Uncle ‘Merica’s 4th of July Do’s and Don’ts

Uncle ‘Merica’s 4th of July Do’s and Don’ts
Uncle Merica here writing this guest post for my friends at MangiaTV.  I want to tell you a few of my thoughts about the 4th of July celebrations.  Firstly remember, the 4th is a Birthday party! You better have some cake.  It’s a celebration of the birth of our country.  That hard fought birth was for three reasons as far as I’m concerned.

  1. All men (and women) are created equal!  It took 239 odd years to figure even men (or women) that want to marry other men (or women) are equal too.  I don’t care if you’re red, green, or blue, go to church, or go to the mountains.  We are all equal.
  2. The individual right to the pursuit of happiness….and the respect to let others do just that.  There should be an addendum to the preamble that says …”Mind your own business”
  3. FIREWORKS…. I’m not talking snakes, or caps, or sparklers…I’m talking Roman Candles, mortars, aerial bombs and M250s…Someone said get some M80s….that is so 70’s. Mericans just love to blow shit up!  And so do I!  Nothing says the 4th more than a good old fashioned bottle rocket fight.  Wear eye protection (though I never seen anyone lose an eye…I’m sure it has happened).

Now this year with all the talk about free trade and such, let me point out that a true Mangia Merica Party has to have three things.  The way to fight globalization is with your wallet. Spend locally and support localization.

  1. Beer: Buy locally brewed beer for your celebration.  Anywhere in this land you must be able to find locally or near locally brewed beer.  Support your local brew master.
  2. Farmers market: I was told once the biggest impact you can have on your carbon footprint is to eat seasonal and local food.  You get to help your local farmers, and reduce your carbon footprint at the same time. #mericannobrainer
  3. Fishing:  I am in agreement we need to fish more!  Bring the catch and some Fish Mojo to the party and watch the smiles and tell a big fish that got away tale of your own.

Finally you need a soundtrack for the bash.  I am a good ole rock and roll lover but a few Merica songs come to mind that you should spin. Young Mericans by David Bowie, Breakfast in Merica by Supertramp, and you can’t go wrong with Creedance Clearwater Revival.  Whatever you choose, get the grill flaming out of control (just for a while) ice down the local brew, and have the burn ointment ready for the Roman Candle War out back (wear eye protection).
Happy Independence Day Merica.  Keep the dream alive.
Watch Uncle ‘Merica take over the 4th of July Cooking Vamp episode HERE.